Chris Thompson   Chris Thompson on the internet

I have one of these smart phone gadgets, with all the fancy-but-generally-pointless applications on them, and earlier on today I was fiddling around with a new app; a metal detecting app. I was curious, was wondering whether it works or not.

Because whilst you can waft it around keys or scissors or some other metal object and it seems to do something, it is just as likely to do nothing at all. It is mostly a green bar that fills up when there is something it recognises as metal, or doesn’t fill up otherwise.

And it got me thinking – with the app store for iPhones and Android devices so thriving, is there anything that there’s not an app for?

Apparently the answer is no. There is even an app for translating your baby’s crying and screaming. Allegedly, this app, if you hold it up to your distressed baby, will tell you if it’s hungry, or just plain pissed off.

It sounds an awful lot like my metal detector. And as such, probably doesn’t work. At least very well. But, for all my criticism, there does appear to be a certain amount of research to back up the apps claims. Research suggests, for example, that the pitch and frequency of a baby’s cries can indicate as much as health problems.

Whether it works or not, we’ve certainly come a long way in a short amount of time – it doesn’t seem that long ago that I was fiddling around on a phone that was just a … well, phone.